An introduction

I know I'm not the most photogenic person in the world. In fact, I hate being captured on film or digital media. Perhaps that's why I like to be on the other side of the camera, taking photographs of people, places and things other than myself. I will try to initiate this blog as openly and honestly as possible, with the necessary disclosures. To start with, My name is Michael. I could have been a Frank, a Steve or a Christopher, but my parents made me a Michael, a common name for a very uncommon person.

The first question that I'm usually asked is "Oh, you take pictures of the homeless?" I typically reply "No, only if I'm doing self portraits."

Am I really homeless? That is a question that is subjective one's perspective and point of view. In fact, there might be homeless people out there in this vast world who take offense to me calling myself homeless, and I respect and accept that. However, by my--and society's--standards, I fit the definition of being among the homeless. I don't wear this like a badge of honor, but I am not ashamed of it, either. I am ashamed of many things I've done in my life, but not being homeless.

I live in a cabin in the woods on property that is not my own. I have electricity. I do not have access to running or hot water. Most of my food is grown or foraged from dumpsters. I visit food pantries when I can. I have no income, no vehicle, no health insurance, no permanent residence. I live a very minimalist lifestyle. So am I homeless? That's something for the reader to decipher.  Up until May of last year, I had a job, a home, friends and family who went out of their ways to help me when I fell on tough times. I took advantage of that, betrayed their love and trust, and hurt them in ways, shapes and forms that will haunt me for my remaining days. I can't turn back the clock and undo these things. I just have to accept them, and hope that at some point in life I can repent and atone for the wrongs I've done. Enough on that for the moment.

My reason for this blog is twofold. One, photography has always been a love of my life. I've been involved with photography on and off since I was fifteen years old. I'm forty-six now if that means anything. I have more than smidgen of formal photography training, and have worked in the field. I enjoy being able to capture things as seen through my aging eyes. I hope this blog to be not only of interest to other people, but also a vehicle of self discovery, that I might, even now, learn and grow through the words and images I put forth on the screen.

If you've followed me here from Godlike Productions or one of the other forums I visit, then you probably already know a good part of my back story. I want this, however, to be a different entity from my other blog or forum threads, a photographic essay of my life and my surroundings. I hope that you, the reader, will enjoy what I have to write and show, and if I can bring some sort of smile, gleam of hope, or thread of enlightenment to even one person then it's all worth the effort.

As I said in my first paragraph, I live, literally, in a cabin in the woods, somewhere in the Adirondack Mountains, where deer, bear, skunks, porcupines and other forms of wildlife are my nearest neighbors. I've been here--now for the second time in my life--since May. Warm summers have given way to the onset of what already threatens to be a cold and brutal winter. The image above is the warm glow of my wood-fired stove, my sole source of heat in this mountain vista. Here I reside with my three most treasured possessions--a camera, a laptop and an $8 coffee maker I got at Walmart.

This is how I heat my cabin in the winter. Unfortunately, I got a late jump on cutting and splitting wood, and a lot of the wood wasn't properly cured and is still damp and wet. For anyone who has ever survived with wood fired heat, you know that wet wood does not burn efficiently, and that most of the energy is lost as the wood sizzles, snaps and pops instead of producing a nice hot flame to curl up beside. Hence, I have to split the wood extra fine, and then set it atop the stove to dry while other wood is struggling to burn in the firebox. Sounds like fun, I know.